Incompatible
by FugaciousFoxglove
Summary: This is a story involving the Ouran High School Host Club going on exchange (for financial benefits, of course) to Bonyari High. They must learn to get along with the "common folk" and adjust to their environment... or not. Introducing Bonyari High School Host Club! Basically, Ouran High School Host Club. But at Bonyari. *This story focuses on the Hitachiins, Haruhi, Ruri, and Shuu


"Huh? Community service?" Tamaki Suoh echoed his friend Kyoya Ohtori. There was a pause as Kyoya took a breath and pushed up his glasses. This was a sign that he was about to present a rather long and tedious explanation to which Tamaki definitely would not listen. However, Tamaki had never been good at picking up on signs, and was, in any case, already beaming.

"What a fantastic idea!" he cried, throwing his arms into the air and spinning. He sparkled, most definitely, from head to toe, "Doing good deeds for the common folk! Spending time with them, learning their wise, common ways! Simply marvellous!" they were nearing the club room now, and Kyoya smiled a little to himself.

"Then, would you like to present the idea to the rest of the club?" he suggested, attempting to pose it as a question. Tamaki beamed again and nodded enthusiastically. No doubt, he would have said something, if Kyoya had not opened the door, causing them to receive the ever so warm welcome of the Hitachiin brothers.

"Yo, Milord. You're late," they claimed in synchronism. Kyoya frowned a little, but made no comment. It was true that most of the other club member were already present- with one unremarkable exception- but he would question the use of the word 'late'.

"Oh, were you waiting?" Tamaki began, sparkling again, "For me?" he threw an arm over his forehead tragically, "Never fear! I have arrived! You need not waste away in anticipation of my return _any longer!_ For the King is in impeccable attendance!" he declared. He sparkled awkwardly for a few seconds.

"Ew." The twins remarked bluntly. Tamaki clutched his heart and bent over, crushed by the blow. He teared up and stared at them, earning a sympathetic pout from Mitsukuni (Hunny) Haninozuka.

"Tamaki. Tell them about that 'wonderful idea' you were just telling me about," Kyoya hinted. Tamaki brightened suddenly.

"Yes! It was indeed a splendid thought!" he declared, once again sparkling. Before continuing, he looked around, "But first, where's Haruhi?" he asked, deflating slightly. The twins shrugged. Hunny threw his hands in the air, and Takashi (Mori) Morinozuka mimicked the action.

"I don't know!" Hunny cried, characteristically giving the impression of flowers about him. Tamaki pouted, but at that moment, the subject in question opened the door calmly.

"Haruhi!" Tamaki yelled, running at her like a bull. She dodged him swiftly, and he teared up again, "Don't run away from Dad! And don't be late!" he sobbed.

"Huh?" Haruhi said, "I thought I was on time for once," Kyoya checked his watch. She _was_ on time. Not that he had ever thought differently.

"Tama-chan was just talking to us about an idea he's had!" Hunny filled the girl in. Haruhi's face became incredibly unenthusiastic, and the twins grinned.

"I was!" Tamaki remembered, jumping up, "We shall do community service!" he announced grandly. The room was silent. Everyone's face was blank, save Tamaki's.

"What? What's wrong?" Tamaki asked. Hunny put a finger to the corner of his mouth, as if he were thinking something through.

"Um… Tama-chan, what do you mean? What sort of community service?" he wondered. Tamaki took a breath, realised he had nothing to say, and looked at Kyoya for help. The latter sighed.

"At a school. It's less 'community service' so much as it is 'temporary transfer' if you like. A…" he glanced at Haruhi and smiled, "less privileged high school called 'Bonyari High' would send seven of their students here, and we would attend their school for a time. Like an exchange program. I explained this to Tamaki, but he seems to have only picked up on the words 'community service' and-"

"It's even more brilliant than I thought!" Tamaki declared, clasping Kyoya's hands for no apparent reason. He turned to the rest of the club, "We would be spending time with the common folk! More of the group from which Haruhi herself emerged! The fascinating bunch who have no time to make their own coffee! We could learn so much! About them, their customs, practices, habits and, of course, Haruhi! So, what do you say?"

"No." the twins and Haruhi said, crossing their arms in front of them. Tamaki sniffled.

"Why not?" he whined. Kyoya broke in.

"This would actually be of incredible benefit to the Host Club's popularity and financial resources. I have already sought permission from Bonyari High's headmaster to open a temporary Host Club there, which I believe will be well received. The common folk have, after all, never been exposed to anything of this sort, and will be as equally fascinated in us as Tamaki is in them," Kyoya smiled his special smile. The Hitachiin's shrivelled.

"So… we don't have a choice… right?" they surmised. Kyoya's smile widened.

"There's _always_ a _choice_ , of course," he knew that his glasses were now shimmering over his eyes, and he could feel the twins shiver. That was the end of _that_. Of course.

"I want to do it!" Hunny declared, waving Bun-Bun in the air as though trying to be dramatic. Mori nodded. Tamaki stood proudly, sparkling so much it was almost hard to look at him, and wearing his stupidest smile. Now, it was only Haruhi.

"Don't _you_ want to do it too, Haru-chan?" Hunny wondered, grabbing the younger member's sleeve and looking up into her eyes. Haruhi's scowl faded a little, but she still appeared unsure.

"Of course, the trouble you _not_ going would cause us could _easily_ be paid off by I don't know, say, _tripling_ your debt?" Kyoya smiled once more. Haruhi sighed, and it seemed like all the air had gone out of her, "Excellent!" Kyoya added, "We leave tomorrow!"

"And here I thought it was _Tamaki's_ idea," Kaoru grumbled as the matter was settled. But he had so very little idea how disastrous 'Tamaki's idea' would turn out to be. Neither did Kyoya.

"Er… _this_ is Bonyari High?" Tamaki's enthusiasm had dwindled once he had actually laid eyes on the place he was to spend the next few weeks. Hunny looked a little worried, and the twins were outright making faces.

"Ok! Milord doesn't like it! Let's leave!" they suggested cheerfully. Tamaki considered the idea nervously. He had been so excited, but really, the place was a little…

"Oh. It looks a bit like my middle school," Haruhi noted, as though she had expected something worse. Tamaki felt himself tear up a little.

"We go forth!" he declared. Then he turned to Haruhi and grabbed her by the shoulders, "I'm so sorry you had to spend years in a place like this! But we shall brave it for you!"

"I'm fine," Haruhi claimed, resolutely looking away from Tamaki. Kyoya pushed up his glasses and emitted a polite cough.

"Well, in that case, are we ready to enter? I believe there are people here to greet us from our respective classes," he gestured as six people in the pitiful Bonyari Highschool uniform approached them. Tamaki was shocked.

"We're not all going to be in the same class!?" he demanded. It was one of the reasons he had been so excited in the first place. Being in the same room as Haruhi for an entire day…

"Well, of course not, idiot," the twins stated plainly, "We're in different years!" Tamaki had a comment prepared, but was interrupted by the six Bonyari students.

"Excuse me, you are the temporary transfer students from Ouran Highschool, correct?" a sweet looking girl asked pleasantly. Tamaki gasped.

"Ah! Of course! Allow me to introduce myself!" he declared, getting down on one knee and clasping the girl's hand, "I am Tamaki Suoh, a second year at Ouran Highschool! Though I am not yet familiar with the enchanting ways of the common folk, I will try my best to adapt. I am sure your customs are as beautiful as you, my lady," he concluded gallantly. All six Bonyari students stared down at him blankly. He turned behind him, confused, where Haruhi was giving a similarly blank look. Hunny, Mori and Kyoya looked the same as always. The twins were laughing so hard they were crying.

"Uh… okay…" a boy with messy black hair and not particularly interesting looks said, breaking the silence, "Um… I'm Raku Ichijo. I'm a first year here, at Bonyari. Er… this is K-Kosaki Onodera, she's also a first year. And these are two of the second years-"

"Boring!" the twins cut in rudely. Tamaki whacked them each over their heads.

"I apologise! These two are Kaoru and Hikaru Hitachiin. They're first years, and quite rude! Please pay them no mind," he suggested cheerfully.

"Thank you, Raku Ichijo, for your introductions," Kyoya said, ignoring the fact that Ichijo hadn't finished, "Please allow me to introduce: Haruhi Fujioka, a first year; myself, Kyoya Ohtori, a second year; Takashi Morinozuka, a third year; and Mitsukuni Haninozuka, a third year," he smiled pleasantly.

"A third…" several of the Bonyari students trailed, staring at Hunny. Hunny, himself, beamed.

"Call me Hunny!" he requested. The other students were too shocked to do anything but nod.

"Er…" one of the third years from Bonyari began tentatively, "forgive me if this is an obvious question, but… is that a… er… rabbit?" Hunny beamed even wider.

"Yeah! This is my Bun-Bun!" he declared, "Do you want to hold him?" he offered. The third year gulped visibly.

"Er, no thanks. We should probably take you to your classes? There will be a tour later, but class is about to start, and you don't want to be late on your first day," he stated, recovering. Hunny nodded seriously before taking Mori's hand.

"Mm-hm! Bye-bye Tama-chan! Bye-bye Kyoya! Bye-bye Hikaru~! Bye-bye Kaoru~! Bye-bye Haru-chan!" he sang, following the Bonyari third years away. Had Tamaki been more observant, he would have noticed the doomed looks on their faces.

"Waaah! Hunny-senpai! Mori-senpai!" Tamaki cried instead. Kyoya hit him over the head with his notebook, and the former shut up.

"Er… then… first years… uhm… follow Ichijo and me, please," the girl called Onodera suggested, smiling. She was very pretty, Tamaki noted vaguely, but not as cute as Haruhi!

"Ah! Haruhi! No! Don't go! Don't leave me with Kyo-" he began, but Haruhi was already ignoring him in favour of following the pretty girl and the average boy. Kyoya was writing something down in his notebook.

"Later, Milord!" the twins cried, an arm each around Haruhi. Tamaki growled.

"Don't do anything weird to your sis-!" this time, he stopped himself short, clamping a hand over his own mouth. The twins mock gasped and put their hands over Haruhi's ears.

"Tamaki…" the boy in question turned to Kyoya, who was smiling sweetly again. Tamaki screamed.

Kosaki Onodera had, at first, been unhappy when she had drawn one of the two short straws for grabbing the students. However, when she found out that Raku Ichijo had drawn the other, it had suddenly become a dream come true. She only wished she were better at conversation.

Kosaki smiled weakly as she and Ichijo directed three very rich, very beautiful boys towards their classroom. She had never been particularly good at small talk.

"Uh… so, your friends seem very… lively," she offered. The prospect of twins had always unnerved her slightly. She didn't think anyone should be able to tell what anyone else was thinking, even if they had once shared a womb.

"Not really," said twins answered simultaneously, shrugging, "That's just Milord you're talking about," Kosaki frowned a little. She had heard them use this term to describe the foreign second year previously, but had been sure she had misheard.

"Er… did you just call Suoh-" she began. She didn't get to finish, though, because the Hitachiin brothers appeared to be able to tell what _she_ was thinking, too.

"Oh, don't take any notice of that!" the ordered together, "It's because he uses lordly speech," one of them explained. It was absolutely impossible to tell them apart.

"Oh," Kosaki offered, though she was still confused. The third boy, Fujioka, also emitted an 'oh' noise.

"Is that why? I never knew," he claimed. The twins blinked.

"Really?" they asked. The one who hadn't spoken on his own yet continued, "I guess you're not really one to care about that, are you, Haruhi?"

"Mm. I guess not," the boy agreed. The twins put their hands to their faces.

"So mean! You should take more of an interest in us, Haruhi!" they wailed. Kosaki ceased to listen for a moment. Ichijo had been very quiet.

"Are you okay, Ichijo?" she asked. Ichijo jumped a little. The twins stopped talking.

"Ah! Um, yeah! Sorry," Ichijo said. He turned to the Ouran students, "So, what's with that second year? He's pretty attached to you guys, huh? Is he a close friend?"

"Not really," the twins answered again, "Milord is just Milord! And Milord is…" the considered for a moment, "An idiot!" they decided. Ichijo grimaced slightly.

"Uh, Fujioka, is it? What about you? Is he your friend? He seemed to _really_ not want you to go?" he tried again. Fujioka thought for a minute.

"Tamaki is… my senpai," he offered finally. Kosaki felt bad for the second year.

"Um… we have some pretty interesting characters in our school, too, right, Ichijo?" she attempted, "Like Marika for instance…" but they had arrived at the classroom, so the conversation ended.

"This is our classroom!" Ichijo said, opening the door, "Yui-nii- ah! I mean, Yui-sensei, we brought the exchange students."

"Woah. That teacher's your sister?" the twins asked. Ichijo blushed a little.

"Ah, I mean, no. She's a childhood friend, and she's staying at my house, so she's _like_ my sister, ah… ah-heh," he explained nervously. The twins waved their hands dismissively.

"Bah. Boring," they declared the situation. Yui Kanakura smiled as though she hadn't heard them.

"Thank you, Raku, Kosaki. You may sit down now," she said. Kosaki and Ichijo did as they were told. The boys from Ouran stood up the front of the class. There were many 'ooh's and 'ahh's from the girls. Even some of the boys seemed impressed. Kosaki was reminded of the time Tsugumi Seishiro had transferred to their class. She had confidence the situation would be somewhat different this time, though.

"Please welcome Kaoru and Hikaru Hitachiin, and Haruhi Fujioka. They will be spending the next month here, in place of your other classmates. They have come from Ouran Highschool- a very wealthy and prestigious school," Kosaki couldn't help but wonder if Miss Kanakura was trying to shame them a little, "Please make them and the other four exchange students throughout the school feel welcome during their stay! Now, please introduce yourselves,"

"What? But didn't you just do that?" one of the twins asked. Miss Kanakura smiled again.

"Uh-huh! But it's tradition!" she explained. The brother's looked a little peeved.

"Hi," one of them said, anyway, "We're Hikaru and Kaoru Hitachiin. Nice to meet you," they finished together flatly. Looked like it would take some work to figure out which was which.

"Oh. Hello. I'm Haruhi Fujioka. Uh…" Fujioka looked around a little, as if she had just arrived home after being away for several years, "Please take care of me," he finished. The class 'ooh'-ed some more. Even Kosaki had to admit it: Fujioka was very cute.

"Geez, Haruhi. You're popular everywhere," Hikaru or Kaoru said, grimacing a little. Miss Kanakura grinned.

"Now, go find your seats! There should be three empty ones," Kosaki looked around to see where said empty seats were. There was one behind her, one to her left and in front- in front of Ichijo- and one next to Ruri.

"Huh?" Hikaru and Kaoru demanded, on seeing the seats. Apparently, they expected to sit together. But Haruhi simply smiled, and sat down in the chair in front of Ichijo.

"I have a feeling this will be more peaceful than I had feared," he said dreamily. The twins fumed. A special glance from Miss Kanakura kept them from complaining, though. Miss Kanakura was scary.

Hikaru- or was it Kaoru? One of them sat down behind Kosaki, and the other next to Ruri. Kosaki bit her lip. She had a bad feeling about the next few weeks.

Kaoru rested his chin on his fist and pouted. He was not happy about being separated from Hikaru and Haruhi, if only by a margin of a few chairs. There were people in the way, and all the people were boring. He appeared to be surrounded by a large number of girls who wouldn't stop talking, with one barely notable exception. The girl to his left with glasses and very long, dark hair seemed to be purposefully ignoring him. Kaoru wondered if he should tease her a bit, or just be happy that at least not _everyone_ was so intent on occupying all of his time. He was still deciding, when the girl's head suddenly jerked backwards, causing Kaoru to jump a little in his seat.

"Ruri~" a blonde boy with round glasses sang, tugging on the girl's hair. It seemed the boy had yanked the girl's ponytail, causing her head to jerk in such a manner. Common folk were more barbaric than Kaoru had realised! Not that he had never pulled someone's hair before…

"Maiko…" the girl growled, turning slightly in her chair and attempting to pry her hair from the boy's fingers. The boy smiled happily, as though they were having a normal conversation.

"I can't help but notice that you have neglected to introduce yourself to your new buddy!" the boy- Maiko- said, gesturing to Kaoru. Kaoru blinked, unsure if he was supposed to be part of the conversation or not. It didn't seem all that interesting, but then again, neither did anything else around him. He certainly wasn't focussing on whatever the old, grumpy looking man up the front was trying to tell them.

"Hi!" the blonde boy said, smiling and waving genially. Kaoru blinked, already bored, "This is Ruri!" Maiko continued, gesturing at the girl with dark hair.

"Uh-huh," Kaoru said tonelessly. The girl sighed. A very short, sharp exhale. She turned back to her work.

"Ruri!" Maiko tugged at her hair again, and she whipped around furiously. Kaoru decided to keep watching. Just for a little.

"Introduce yourself," Maiko commanded. The girl glared for a moment before turning to Kaoru. When she spoke, it was much more gently than Kaoru had expected.

"I'm Ruri Miyamoto. Nice to meet you," though she could have sounded more excited about it. She glanced at Maiko, as if to say 'am I done, now?'. Maiko grinned.

"I'm Shu! You're Kaoru Hitachiin, right?" he wondered gaily. Kaoru noticed the other boy was still holding Miyamoto's hair.

"Nah," Kaoru said automatically, "I'm Hikaru," Maiko blinked, then burst out laughing. He turned to Miyamoto.

"That's funny! Isn't that funny, Ruri?" he wiped a tear, wheezing a little. Miyamoto frowned a little.

"Not really," she claimed dryly. Maiko smiled at Kaoru.

"Why are you laughing?" Kaoru wondered. He wasn't finding anything funny. Which was rare. And a little worrying.

"So, Kaoru," Maiko began, smiling, "What's it like to be rich?"

"Come on, Maiko, you could ask any number of people that," Miyamoto said. Kaoru sincerely doubted that.

"Like who?" Maiko voiced Kaoru's very thoughts. Miyamoto pointed a surprisingly tiny finger at the black-haired boy who had shown Kaoru, Hikaru and Haruhi to the classroom.

"Raku, for instance," she claimed. Kaoru raised an eyebrow. The black-haired boy was boring and messy. And definitely did not look rich.

"That's a very different kind of rich," Maiko stated. Kaoru wondered just how many types of rich this commoner thought there were.

"Then what about Tachibana?" Miyamoto suggested. Maiko bit his lip a little, but grinned. The question remained unanswered as he turned to Kaoru.

"So? What's Ouran like?" Maiko inquired. Kaoru sighed. This guy was just the same as everyone else.

"More interesting than here, that's for sure," he groaned, attempting to find something else to occupy his time with. It seemed the other boy would not let him.

"Really? Is that because of the Host Club?" he asked. Kaoru only allowed himself to be surprised for a moment. Miyamoto looked disgusted.

"Host Club?" she echoed, trying to tug her hair from Maiko's grasp. Kaoru ignored them. They were boring. He glanced at Hikaru- who seemed equally as bored- and Haruhi- who seemed to be completely comfortable and happy. This made Kaoru angry.

"Hey, I wonder if the same thing that happened with Tsugumi will happen to Fujioka?" he tuned in to the blonde boy's words. What was that about Haruhi?

"Well, Fujioka doesn't look the type to challenge Ichijo to a fight to the death, though," Miyamoto pointed out. _What!?_

"What?" Kaoru demanded, only a little concerned. Miyamoto blinked as if she had forgotten he was there. Maiko grinned.

"You're right," he said to Miyamoto, "Seems like Fujioka's more in Chitoge's position, this time," he was ignoring Kaoru! This was a new experience. At least from strangers, anyway.

"Since when have you called her Chitoge?" Miyamoto demanded. Maiko held up his hands in defeat.

"Kirisaki, Kirisaki!" he corrected himself. How rude, thought Kaoru, that they included me in a conversation then forcibly left me out of it!

"Good. Now will you _let go_ of my hair?" Miyamoto demanded, suddenly looking a bit like Kyoya. Kaoru found himself shivering involuntarily. Maiko let go of the girl's hair.

"So, Kaoru," Maiko began, reincluding the richer boy, "When will the Bonyari Host Club be open? I know it's a temporary organisation, but you might want to get the lunch breaks extended. We don't have all that much time here,"

"I don't know," Kaoru answered flippantly. He didn't like this guy, "You'll need to talk to Kyoya about that," he suggested, knowing full well this would confuse the annoying boy. He didn't get his desired response, though.

"I have been," Maiko claimed, "But he's so secretive. He wouldn't tell me _anything_ ," Kaoru was now quite ready to do something terrible. He wasn't sure what, but something terrible that this annoying brat would hate.


End file.
